How to Drive in Atlanta, By A Proud Yankee...

Jun 25, 2010

Photo still by, ME!!!

Driving isn’t hard. If you are intimidated by driving, then don’t drive. Get a state issued ID that looks just like a license (Note: I know they have them in NY but not sure about GA).

Driving still isn’t hard. It’s just people make it harder on other folks.

Driving Offense Number 1 and this is major… because if people would stop doing this mess, there would be less accidents on the road.

Highways have multiple lanes, and those lanes have names. The right lane is called the Slow Lane. Those who drive a little slower than the speed limit should ONLY drive in those lanes. The middle lane, is for those who can do the speed limit, and the fast lane is for those who go over the speed limit.

If you can’t handle driving in the fast lane or the middle lane then don’t drive in it. You are creating potential accidents when you do so.

“Well how do you know if you can’t handle driving in that lane?” Glad you asked me. If you look in your mirror and there’s a line of cars behind you on your bumper, maybe you should move out of that lane and stop being an insensitive jerk and messing up other people.

Driving offense number 2: The whole “talking on your phone” topic is more for specific drivers. Personally, I can handle talking on the phone while driving because I don’t get lost in my conversations. Those who get more involved in phone conversations/conversations with people in the car shouldn’t drive and talk at the same time, because those type of people are the ones who don’t pay attention to the road.

Not every driver is the same. I can drive and talk SAFETY at the same time because: I don’t have to hold or look at the phone as I’m talking because of this wonderful invention called SPEAKERPHONE. Plus like I stated before, I don’t get lost in conversations. If you’re in the middle of an intense conversation, then PULL OVER.

Driving Offense Number 3: People not knowing where they’re going. Those who suck at reading directions, there’s a wonderful invention called a navigational system. USE IT, it’s not just for decoration.

Driving Offense Number 4: Driving fast during bad conditions… Slow down when it is raining, snowing, icy conditions, etc. When it is raining, people tend to drive faster than they would when it’s dry. Because they think they’re not gonna lose control in their pickup truck (I’m stereotyping against the hillbilly South, but it is the truth). So then when it rains, there’s 90 million accidents because a dummy was speeding in the rain, and if I’m on that same road, waiting to drive past the accident in traffic, I’m mad at the dummy because they’re making me late to an event, meeting, or going home to watch Keeping Up With the Kardashians.

I’m gonna be honest, when it’s a rainy day, and I don’t have to go out, I don’t go out because I’m not dealing with a bunch of accidents on the road. And if someone hits my ‘Voy, that same person will feel Bernie’s wrath- young or old.

And that my friends is what Bernie top 4 Driving Offenses that’s committed in Atlanta, and I’m sure they happen everywhere… And if I offended you, then quit crying and drive better. Doesn't it feel good to vent.

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